On a scale of one to ten, Xander decided, life sucked.
Since his return from Africa, Giles had had him taking a more operational role in things, and his soldier memories from that Halloween oh-so-long ago had started coming back.
And now, here he was, in some dinky little town in Scotland with some super-vampire about to make a meal out of him.
It should have been easy. He'd brought a dozen Slayers with him, after all, and it was just one measly vampire, right?
Nooo. Of course it wasn't that easy. Even if he survived this, he'd have to explain just how a dozen Slayers got killed on his watch against one not-so-measly vampire.
And then there was that nutcase in red with the hand cannon.
"Are you a virgin?" the man asked.
Xander sputtered, "What? No!"
"Pity."
Xander paled and struggled again, but the vampire yanked him by his camouflage BDUs toward her and bit into his throat.
He heard a gunshot and felt something slam into him.
"Ow."
Alucard turned and stared.
That shouldn't be possible. He wasn't a virgin.
But Alucard couldn't deny what he was seeing. The young soldier was sitting up, complaining, and healed of all his injuries, even that missing eye of his.
Sir Integral Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing was not happy.
"AGAIN?!?"
No, not happy at all.
Xander followed Alucard into the Hellsing basement. Though "dungeon" or "catacombs" might have been a better word. He wasn't sure about that.
He'd overheard the reaming out Alucard had gotten for this, but it wasn't like the older vampire -- Xander shuddered at the thought, but his soul still seemed to be intact -- had actually been the one who turned him.
Alucard stopped and opened a door. Xander saw a blonde young woman inside, wearing a police uniform.
"Police Girl, Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy, Police Girl."