Adventures in Wolfsitting
or Naughty and Nice

A Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fanfiction Story

Author: Jason W Thompson <jwt6577[at]>

September 12, 2000

Disclaimer: Once upon a time there was a guy he wrote a story with characters and settings he didn't own, but he put a disclaimer on his story and that made it a little less illegal. BTVS and Angel are owned by Joss, Fox, Mutant Enemy, and the WB. I don't own anything except the situation characters are in.

Category: Buffy/Faith/Xander

Spoilers: "The Zeppo"

Warnings: Language, sex, voyeurism, implied exhibitionism, f/f/m

Summary: Xander is all set for a boring night of Wolfsitting, when he gets a visit from a pair of Slayers.

Rating: NC-17

Distribution: Ask First.

Notes: Xander is stuck Wolfsitting Oz, when he's paid a visit by our favorite slayer(or slayers depending on your preference.)


Also include if you'd like some of the following:

  1. A Megadeth CD.
  2. Xander reading a Playboy "Girls of the Big 10" issue.
  3. Adidas sneakers.
  4. A shirt with the word "Naughty" written on it.
  5. "Mug" Root Beer.
  6. The line: "What else do you have to do tonight?" with the answering line, "Um... ah... nothing that involves nudity I don't think."
  7. Boxers with some sort of sexual saying written on them.
  8. Xander torn between Ho-hos or Twinkies.
  9. Some sort of damage to Giles desk

Dedication: As always, dedicated to Mary. Also Dedicated to Duchess, Dale, Nate, Stone Cold, Aslan and Bri, who have allowed me to bounce my ideas off them, and Krac, cause she needs support if she's every gonna return to the world of sanity. Thirdly dedicated to those select few B/F/X shippers.

Xander sat his stereo on the counter and popped in his copy of "Cryptic Writings" by Megadeth and pressed play. He walked to the table and flopped down in a chair facing Oz, he popped open a can of "Mug" root beer and propped his feet up on the desk. Oz stalked the bookcage, giving him a wary eye, Xander scowled at the wolf who was the current form of Willow's boyfriend. "What?" The wolf growled at him. Xander pretended to perk up, "What's that Ozzy? Is Giles down the well again?"

Oz growled at him again before laying down in the corner, Xander merely waved dismissively and grabbed his bag. Digging into it he pulled out his "Girls of the Big 10" issue of Playboy, thumbing through it straight to the nude pictures. "Oh my, thank God for Hugh Hefner."

Xander subconsciously paid attention to the CD while he concentrated on the two-dimensional beautiful women on the pages. He was in the middle of memorizing Miss October's measurements when the doors came open. Xander fumbled twice with the Playboy before it flew out of his hands altogether going over his head. Xander reached back for it and fell out of the chair, bouncing his head hard on the floor. "OW!"

Xander tried to blink the spots out of his vision, he looked to his left and found a pair of high shined, black combat boots. Xander rolled his head to the other side and found a second pair of similar boots. "If I look up and find Army recruiters, I'm gonna be disappointed."

Looking up, Xander found the objects of ninety-five percent of his sexual fantasies. Buffy and Faith. Faith held her hand out to him, while Buffy held up the Playboy and said, "Studying Xand?"

After being hauled to his feet, Xander laughed nervously and sat on the table. "Uh... yeah." Xander took in Faith and Buffy. It looked to him that they had either bought new matching clothes or by some Hellmouth miracle dressed alike. Both were wearing black pants, very form fitting black pants, the only difference between them were that Faith's were leather. Both wore mid-drift shirts, Buffy's was black and had the word "Naughty" in red letters with devil horns of the "N" and demon tail on the "Y" underlined by a pitchfork. Meanwhile, Faith's shirt was white with "Nice" written using some pretty script, with a Halo over the "N." Xander also noticed something on Faith he didn't remember from their night together, a navel ring. Xander cocked an eyebrow at them, "So are the shirts a lesson in irony?"

Buffy smirked while Faith laughed and said, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Xander grinned, "Well, if I were to have guessed, I would've said you were the naughty one Faith."

Buffy stepped forward and trailed a finger over Xander's chest, bringing a shiver from him and sending his heart into heart-attack speeds. She leaned in very close to his ear and let her breath caress it before whispering. "I can be naughty too."

Xander was pretty sure he was having a stroke, 'Speaking of stroke... Down Hormone-Boy!' Xander had a decision, fight or flight. Or would this be "mate or wait?" Stupid biology class! "H-how... How naughty?" Xander groaned internally, 'Smooth Xand, stuttering and voice cracking. You are such a dufus.'

Buffy blew lightly on his ear before stepping back. She smiled devilishly, "As naughty as I want. That is, if you like naughty?"

Faith stepped up to Xander and pressed her body flush against him before wrapping her arms around his neck. She licked his bottom lip and smiled as evil as Buffy's earlier smile, "Or maybe you'd prefer Nice. I can be nice Xand..." She thrust her hips into Xander's already raging hard-on, "You want me to be nice?" Xander groaned audibly.

Xander thoughts were running circles, but one came out of the mess, finding its way to his lips, "What's going on?"

Xander watched Buffy walk around behind Xander and sat behind him and began to rub his shoulders with her strong hands. "God Xander you're so tense..."

Xander's eyes immediately fell closed. "Well... It's the uh... Wolfsitting." Xander felt the tension immediately bleed away from his body under Buffy's hands and Faith's nuzzling of his throat.

Buffy's voice filled with honey, "Oh, I'm sorry baby. That's one of the reasons Faith and I came by. We knew you might be lonely tonight."

Xander suddenly became tense again. Buffy just referred to him as baby, and Faith's hands were kneading his thighs. "Um... Buff, Faith, what's going on?"

Faith smiled at him, "Well Buffy and I were working out this morning," She paused allowing Xander to soak in the mental image of Faith and Buffy working out together, getting sweaty... "Well, things got a little playful and Buffy decided that she wanted to turn our workout into a clothing optional experience." She smiled at the deep shade of red Xander became at the mental image of Buffy and Faith having sex. "Let me tell you, Buffy is a moaner. 'Oh Faith... Oh God... Oh YES!'" Xander eyes fell closed and Faith began to stroke his rigid member through his jeans while Buffy pressed her body firmly against his back and began to trail kisses over his neck. "She tastes incredible too. Then when she made me lie back on the mats and she dipped her head down between my parted thighs" Faith's voice deepened as it filled with lust, while Buffy was making little whimpers.

"Oh when she made, those first inexperienced licks and she sucked on my aching clit that first time, I almost came then and there..." By this point in Faith's retelling, Faith needed some release, she took Xander's hands and led them to her fly, "Touch me..." She ground out. Xander opened her fly with shaking hands before he dipped his left hand inside and found her throbbing, soaked pussy, Faith let out a feral growl as Xander began to massage her clit with his fingers. "She began to lick my dripping pussy, she's a quick learner too. I... ah... was s-surprised at how well she could bring me off." Faith groaned while Xander tensed into her hand. Buffy quickly unbuttoned Xander's shirt before capturing Faith's mouth in a hungry kiss.

Breaking the kiss, Faith found one of Xander's nipples with her mouth, sucking and biting it. Xander moaned, before he found his mouth covered by Buffy's, the blonde slayer's tongue attacking his mouth, tempting his tongue to do a carnal dance with hers.


Faith's voice was almost unrecognizable as she continued, "It didn't take long before I was arching into her talented mouth, crying out and bucking against her mouth. Finally I screamed, 'Buffy!' and came all over her mouth." Faith was coming close to the edge when Xander dipped two fingers inside of her, thrusting hard and fast. Faith clenched her eyes shut and screamed out Xander's name as she came, spilling her juices all over Xander's hand. Xander tensed and arched into Faith's hand spilling his seed inside his pants. Faith slumped into Xander's chest, breathing hard.

Buffy smirked at the pair, "I hope you two aren't worn out, cause I want a piece of you two." Buffy stood off the table and pulled Faith to her by the hips and kissed the raven haired slayer, gently at first, but gaining in passion quickly. Xander watched them, Buffy cupping and squeezing Faith's ass and grinding her hips into Faith's. Buffy ended their kiss after sucking on Faith's bottom lip, finally flicking her tongue on it and smiling. Buffy pulled Faith's shirt over her head, freeing her full breasts. Buffy circled Faith's nipples with her tongue before kneeling down, trailing her tongue down Faith's flesh as she did. Faith turned around and leaned against the table, pressing back against Xander.

Regaining his senses and his courage, Xander cupped her breasts and was rewarded with a drawn out moan as Faith pressed her breasts into his hands. Buffy smiled evilly up at Faith and Xander as she unlaced Faith left boot. Pulling the boot off, she threw it over her shoulder, then stripped her sock. Faith squealed then giggled in surprise when Buffy licked then sucked on her big toe. "Kinky Buff."

Buffy chuckled then bit the end of Faith's other bootlace, untying the bow. She unlaced her boot then yanked off her boot, casting it aside. She yanked off Faith's sock, then slid her hands slowly up the sides of Faith's legs. Finding the waistband of Faith's pants, she began to pull them off. Faith lifted her hips and helped Buffy push them down, after a brief struggle with the leather, Faith was free of all her clothing.

Buffy sat up until her face was level with Faith's welcoming thighs. Buffy leaned forward until her lips were barely separated from Faith's dripping slit. She blew lightly over Faith's clit, she smiled when Faith moaned loudly and arched towards Buffy, barely restrained by Xander who was squeezing her breasts and playing with her nipples. Faith gripped Xander's knees like iron when Buffy took her clit into her warm, moist mouth.

Buffy played with Faith's clit using her teeth, tongue and lips, enjoying the sound of Faith's moans and cries. She pushed her tongue into Faith's slick folds and tasted her arousal completely. Faith quickly approached her second orgasm, as she came closer she screamed out Buffy's name before plundering Xander's mouth, driving her tongue into Xander's mouth and fighting his tongue with hers. Buffy finally took pity on Faith and scraped her teeth over Faith's clit. Faith arched her hips up and her nails dug into Xander's knees, while she screamed around Xander's mouth.

Faith stood off the table on shaky legs while Xander grabbed Buffy and kissed her roughly, tasting Faith's cum all over her mouth. Xander pushed her into the counter. The struggled for dominance and moved along the counter before stumbling into Giles' office door. Buffy reached behind her and turned the door knob and they tumbled backward, Buffy landing on his desk. She broke the kiss, then with a sweep, she scattered the contents of Giles' desk then hopped on top of it.

With a lop-sided grin and a hungry look in his eyes, Xander pulled Buffy's shirt over her head, leaving her in a black lace bra. Xander then dropped to his knees and began to unlace Buffy's boots, yanking them off her feet impatiently.

As Xander was pulling off her boots, Faith came into the office and sat down on the desk next to Buffy, kissing Buffy feverishly. Xander yanked her other sock off before unbuttoning her pants and sliding them and her panties off in a single motion. Xander quickly shed his clothing before kneeling before Buffy and letting her place her legs on his shoulders. Xander leaned forward, inhaling her scent, his nose buried in the moist patch of curly hair. Running his tongue over her slit causing Buffy to tense into his mouth as she tangled her fingers in Xander's hair.

Faith unfastened Buffy's bra and tossed the offending garment aside, taking one of Buffy's breasts into her mouth, Buffy began to moan as Faith and Xander ravaged her body. Faith sucked on her nipple while Xander eagerly lapped at her sex. Buffy was lost in a world of pleasure. She ground her dripping pussy into Xander's mouth, holding his face to her tightly. The closer she came to orgasm the hard she ground into Xander. Xander pushed two fingers inside of Buffy.

"Oooh! God yes Xander!" She writhed against him as he sucked on clit and fucked her with his fingers. Finally, Buffy arched against his hand and came hard, soaking Xander's hand and mouth with her cum. Xander stood up while Buffy took his fingers and licked them clean.

Xander's eyes widened slightly, and his cock became hard again. Faith smiled, "Oh Xander's all ready to go." She stood off the desk and crossed the office to Xander, she gripped him and began to stroke him until he was fully erect. "I've been waiting to get another shot at you." She sucked on his bottom lip and began to guide his head to her waiting sex.

Buffy sat up, "Faith, no fair. You've already had him, I want to feel Xander inside me... its my turn!" She pouted. Faith smiled and climbed on top of the desk, she pushed Buffy back and kissed her passionately. Xander positioned himself at Buffy's entrance and pushed himself all the way into her slowly. Buffy moaned around Faith's mouth and arched into Xander's cock, taking him in as much as she could. Faith moved until she was lying besides Buffy on the desk, but never breaking their kiss.

Buffy scissored her legs around Xander's waist and urged him on. Xander began to push in and out of her faster and harder, forcing Buffy to break her and Faith's kiss and moan loudly. Faith moved around behind Buffy and sat her up then began to massage her breasts as Xander had done to her earlier. Buffy reached out and pulled Xander to her, kissing him hungrily and driving her tongue into his mouth.

Faith let her hand trail down Buffy's stomach, finding her aching clit and massaging it. Buffy felt as if she would go mad from all the sensations she was experiencing, finally Faith pinched her between her thumb and forefinger, sending Buffy careening over the edge, her inner muscles spasmed around Xander's member and she gripped the sides of Giles desk so hard it splintered the desk. Xander tensed and spilled himself inside Buffy, before slumping against her. They remained entwined with each other for a few minutes just breathing heavily and enjoying each other, before they began to get dressed.

Xander had just finished dressing and was exiting the office when he glanced out the doors and noticed Willow coming down the hall. His eyes widened, he quickly gathered up Faith's clothes and ran inside the office, dumping them into Faith's arms and telling them to stay in there. He bolted from the office just as Willow came in the door. "Willow! WHAT A SURPRISE!"

Willow gave Xander a curious look. "Hey Xander, any trouble tonight?"

Xander shook his head almost violently, "Trouble? Nope, no trouble. Why?" Willow looked at him oddly, "What?"

Willow smiled, "Your barn door Xander..."

Xander looked down and blushed, before turning away from Willow and zipping up his fly. Turning around, he was still beet red. "Sorry."

"Forget it." Willow tried to look over Xander's shoulder, "Are you hiding something?"

"Hiding something? Nope, not me, not hiding a thing. Nosiree Bob! Not hiding a thing."

Willow suddenly became suspicious, "Xander..." She gave him her best imitation of his mother's "out with it Alex" look.

Xander sighed, defeated, "You caught me Wills, Buffy and Faith are in there, we just finished having kinky sex."

Willow laughed, "In your dreams. Well if everything's alright, I've got to get home and write a paper, if you see Buffy tonight have her call me." Xander gave Willow a thumbs up. "Night Xander."

Xander waved at her departing form, "Night Wills."

Xander slumped against the check out counter, Buffy exited the office just wearing her shirt and panties and hopped up on the counter next to him, "Boy Xand, it's a good thing you're good at sex, you are lousy under pressure."

Xander rolled his eyes, "Sorry Buff, I was a little sluggish in the head, lack of blood to the brain."

Buffy leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead, "S'okay, I forgive you."

Faith came out a few minutes later still naked, they looked at each other for a moment, silently. Xander finally asked the one question he had, "So are things going to get weird between us now?"

Faith shrugged, "I don't think so, maybe if this was a heat of the moment thing, but Buffy and I had this planned out..."

Xander cocked an eyebrow, "You had this planned?"

Buffy nodded, "Faith told me you were a good roll, and I figured you'd jump at the chance at having a friends with benefits deal with us. So Xander, what'cha think?"

Xander smirked, "Who am I to turn down two lovely ladies like yourselves?"

Buffy smiled and Faith pulled Xander to her, "That's the Xander I know..." Xander leaned down and captured Faith's lips.

Buffy yelled, "Round two!" Before she jumped off the counter onto the pair...


Oz opened his eyes slowly, he was assaulted by a powerful scent almost immediately, and it was unmistakable. Sex, someone had a lot of sex last night. Oz stood up and took a deeper breath, getting more of the scent, he was pretty sure it was Xander. He quickly dressed and unlocked the door, stepping out of the cage, he noticed Buffy and Faith sleeping at the table while Xander slept on the counter. Oz was confused, the scent was relatively fresh, but why would Buffy AND Faith... Oz took a deep breath. Xander's scent was intermingled with Buffy's and Faith's scents.

Oz cocked an eyebrow and said one word. "Impressive." He turned for the exit. Before he left the library, something occurred to him, "Why do I feel like watching a Lassie re-run?" He shrugged and left the library.

The End