Lost and Alone

Book 1 of the Paladin Journeys

Author: Silent Bob Foley <jm_dover[at]yahoo.com>

Summary: Mythology gives mention of a type of traveling hero, This is the story of the first of the modern paladins and the people who?s loves and lives are affected by a single man and his determination to save those who cannot save themselves

Distribution: Xanderzone ff.net anyone else have it and let me know.

Dedication: Wolfy- dude this is the culmination of several of our conversations- PR is going well man- see what you think of this, Tenhawk for the Journeyverse. Teri for her great fics and new friendship and of course Danii for her great conversations and friendship.


Prologue

An overhand swing brought the axe down onto the log, the piece of wood splintered into a few pieces. Another took it's place and then another, the sun was slowly coming up above the mountains to the east illuminating the large lake to the side of the.

Another swing chopped another log into pieces, the pile to either side gave reference to how long the young man had been at work- hours had gone by the man had been working since dawn.

Swing, Thunk.

Swing, Thunk.

"Hey"

Looking up and wiping away the sweat from his face Alexander Harris looked out across the lake, his dark eyes searching the area, spotting what he was looking for.

"Hey Dingbat!" A voice shouted from the edge of the lake across from the cabin he was at- a young woman with long Red hair was waving at him. Smiling a shaking his head he shouted back.

"Hey Shortcake"

"Grandmum says Breakfast is ready."

"Not Hungry Abby."

The Red-headed English girl looked a bit perturbed at that, she shouted back

"Nan said if you don't get over here she'll remove your pancake privileges." Xander gave up the argument and started his way back- halfway back Abby grabbed him and slipped an arm around his.

Abigail Carroll was the typically brought up English teenager, she was unlike many women Xander had known she had the intelligence but also the outgoing personality that made her approachable without her being an airhead- a rarity in the people he had known. She and her grandmother were spending a few months in the depths of Montana until Abby had to return to England to take her placing at University there.

Her red hair shone in the light of the early morning, he was smaller than he but quite curvy. She could be sweet but also had a cheeky streak almost as big as his- her disposition and looks gave her nickname 'Strawberry Shortcake' or as Xander called her just 'Shortcake'

Walking into the cabin's front room he was accosted by the smell of pancakes and hot grilled food- 'A full English breakfast' sat in front of him.

*The brits see most of us Americans as fat and lazy, but we never eat like this in the morning- and they don't seem to be porky.*

Looking at Abby and then her nan- the exact opposite was true, both were slender and uncommonly attractive, the grandmother was a little over fifty but could have easily passed for younger while Abby had a youthful look that belied her true age. Abby often cursed that as she was almost nineteen and still got asked for identification in the pub.

"Looks great Ms C."

"Alexander I've told you to call me Becky."

Xander sniggered a little but quickly replied that he gave her her full name as it is, mainly because he felt a little uncomfortable at such familiarity and that it was also meant as a means of respect and in his life he had found that those people that deserved his respect would get it with no hesitation..

Becky knew little about Xander as even with his humour and sometime incessant jokes and talking he had mentioned almost nothing to her about his life. Even Abby hadn't been able to get anything out of him, Abby had tried to be a friend to the young man and there was an obvious attraction on both sides but Xander hadn't allowed anything to come of it.

Looking at the brunette boy she sighed and smiled as she watched him virtually inhale the food in front of him. Two breakfasts and eight pieces of toast and three glasses of Milk and one of orange juice later Xander was finally full. Obviously he was much more hungry than he thought- both women knew he had been working since 5:00 am it was now after 10:30.

"Wow Mrs C, I haven't had a breakfast like that since…" he trailed off quietly, "Well it's been a while." Neither woman missed the quick change that he went through and back again but had learnt enough about Xander not to push it. Xander leant back in his chair and closed his eyes a slight but heartfelt smile on his face- one of the few they had ever really seen.

"Alexander, I have some unfortunate news, we… we are leaving the United States sometime in the next week."

Xander shuffled in his seat, "Can't say I didn't expect this Becky." He said with a twinkle in his eye. "I'll be able to be on my way in a day or so." Abigail put her hand over his and squeezed.

"Come with us Xander." She whispered to him, in surprise he looked at both Abby and Becky. Both looked at him with affection and a hope he would come with them, he lowered his eyes and then his head down. He and they knew how much he wanted to go with them, however his answer was also the one that both sides were expecting.

"I can't."

Abby closed her hand over his again and followed up with a tight hug, in less than three weeks they had become very close- both were very friendly and Xander's loyalty to his close friends had extended to both the English women. He hugged back and held on to Abby while she held him, reluctantly they both let go Xander wiping the single tear from Abby's face with a thumb.

"Hey Abigail, I really wish I could but I can't I've got some things I still have to do."

"I know and anyone who meets you will be very lucky, Look after them and yourself Xander."

With that she pulled away and ran out through the back door not wanting to have the man she cared for so much see her cry. Becky watched this exchange and the close to defeated expression and body language of the young man.

"Xander? He looked up into her expressive eyes, "You know you are welcome to come with us no matter what, or even when. Let em know and we'll get you back to England. I know you care for Abby and she for you, are you sure you want to stay."

Xander Looked directly into Becky's eyes and for the first time she saw the man behind the mask, "You know my life and what I've done Becky, I fight because I can't walk away from it. To protect those innocents that need to- your country has their fighters and so does mine- I just have to be one of them."

Becky just nodded her acquiesce at his words, she knew his past as a demon hunter and protector of innocent lives since his adolescent years. Pulling up her bag she pulled out a small plastic envelope, putting it on the table she pushed it towards Xander, his eyebrows popped up and he reluctantly picked it up and pulled out the paper work.

Inside sat three thousand American Dollars in cash and over fifty thousand in assorted cheques, bonds and numerous monetary items. He immediately dropped them onto the table and moved to push them back to the older lady, as he tried to her hand landed on top of his pinning it in place.

"Alexander, you have helped my grand daughter and myself much more than you lknow, she has been alone since she lost her parents you have allowed us both to remember there is good in the world. Please let us help you on your journey, as you have helped us and others. You have a good heart and we just want you to be okay- I just wish I could do more to help you."

Xander once again tried to push the money back and once again was stopped. "I can't take this Mrs C, it's too much. I don't do this for money I do it because I want to, hell I need to do what I do."

"And you need help Alexander, let those of us who can help you. That's just what I can give you now. I do wish it could be much more you deserve the help, I hope my friendship will be enough."

"That is all I could ask for, I don't do this for money and recognition, I don't care if the people I help don't remember what I did, but keeping your friendship makes the last few weeks well worth it."

The older woman stood up and hugged the much taller young man, "if I were many years younger, Abby would have a fight on her hands."

'Anyone who manages to finally keep either of the two of you are will be very lucky men Becky, I care for you both- maybe one day I'll see you both again- hey maybe I'll visit, I just can't do it yet."

He smiled at Becky who still held on, and looked down to his side as another set of arms encircled him and Abby held on. Two months with the girls had changed them into close friends instead of just a handyman and the employers they had been.

*Obligitory flashback*

Swing, Thunk.

Swing, Thunk.

Xander Harris looked up into the distance, it was early autumn, and the chill was just noticeable in the air. However with the work that he was doing he felt little of the cold, taking another swig from his water bottle. The sky was darkening slowly he figured he had about twenty minutes before he had to get indoors, he had found out to his immense displeasure that the rules for being outside at night in Sunnydale were the same all across the country mostly in the massively populated areas, small villages and towns were usually vamp free because too many people would ask questions or get out.

That was why he had traveled up towards the northern states border with Canada- quiet and innocuous townships meant he should be fine. The one town he was in seemed like that on first sighting, but something was different- and he couldn't place it. Something at offended his senses- especially the one he had where Supernatural occurrences appeared,

*My Scooby sense*

He had stuck around for a little while even working at a cabin site for a while to get money and supplies for the next leg of his travels, however later that day his world would be turned around, upside down and kicked in the arse.

WHAM

"Oh god I'm sorry." A flame haired beauty stood in front of him, looking up from his prone position he saw long legs a fantastic body and a gorgeous face with a crown of fire atop her head. The only thing he could think of saying slipped out.

"Wow"

She rolled her eyes and smiled at the young man, offering her hand she helped him up, he accepted and scrambled up, rising to his full height he found her to be only a few inches smaller than him but about the same age.

"Sorry 'bout that. I was in a bit of a rush." Her accent immediately flooded his minds with memories of a father figure and of Knights and a dead parrot.

"Hey no problem, should have been watching where I was going." He extended his hand again. "Xander."

"Abby!" another voice piped up Another redheaded woman this one much older and with hair specked with silver and grey walked towards them- it was obvious at first glance that the two women were related. "there you are young lady- where did you…"

"That would be my fault ma'am." Xander piped up, "I collided with you daughter and kept her from her business. I'm sorry for the inconvenience." He expected the lady to just nod curtly and walk off- he was more than surprised at her reaction- she laughed. A his confused expression the younger lady- Abby explained.

"She not my mum she's my nan- my grandmother."

Xander smiled his trademark lop-side and blushed almost the colour of the girl's hair, he wished he had kept his gob shut.

"Sorry My mistake."

"Nonsense young man, it's the nicest compliment I've had in years. I'm Rebecca Carroll this is my granddaughter Abigail." She gestured to the younger woman.

"Alexander Harris ma'am, at your service."

Both women laughed at his overacting but knew that he meant it too, he was almost an open book.

*End Of This Flashback*

That was the first of several misconceptions they had about Xander, he was in no way an open book And what you saw on the surface was one facet of a very complex individual, this man was much more than he seemed to be. The people that had known him and will know him will be very lucky.

She continued to watch the young man and her granddaughter running around outside messing about and just enjoying the time they had left, Abby was finally happy for the first time in almost a year and Xander had found someone who would trust him and allow him to help them- and to help himself by healing his soul.

Picking up the envelope and money she put it securely in his overcoat pocket- he may not want it but she would be damned if she would let him do what he does without any help or any gratitude.

Two days later

"I'll miss you Shortcake. You two Mrs C." Abby now clung to him with her arms around his neck holding on like she would never see him again *and with my life* Xander thought *That is not too unlikely.* "Hey it's ok Abby I'll keep in contact OK. Just don't forget me."

"No bloody Chance, Thank you for everything Xander." She mumbled into his chest she was still crying but paradoxically had a smile on her face, the type that he would miss. Pulling back she looked into his eyes and kissed him lightly in the lips. To say he was surprised would be a lie- that tension had always been there between them but couldn't be changed no matter how much he had wanted it to, he cupped her cheeks and wiped away her tears. She finally just smiled and turned away from him, she didn't look back as she boarded the 747.

He turned and looked at the older of the Carrolls' she also had slight tears in her eyes much like his, she didn't really know what to say so she just hugged him tightly and patting him on the cheek she just whispered

"Goodbye"

She also turned and boarded the 747 never looking back because she knew like her grand daughter she would likely break down and cry her heart out. Few people had ever broken through her emotional defences but in one fail swoop the friendly young American had changed her mind and her emotions forever.

He watched the plane as it took off and disappeared into the firmament back toward the mother land of English and Americans alike.

Abigail and Rebecca Carroll Apprentice and field watchers would never see Alexander Harris again.

TBC…