He was waiting behind the door, trying to rush her as she opened it, balancing the instruments of his next torture, but unfortunately he didn't noticed the fuzzy small plotbunny trying to rub against his legs in hope of being noticed and stumbled.
"Are you ok?" the authoress asked worriedly.
A string of curses was answer enough for her.
"What were you doing, by the way?" she asked curious.
Xander glared at the costume she was still holding.
"I was trying to save some of my dignity. Every time you enter the room with a costume I am forced into the most rediculus situations."
"Oh come on, Xander. We have done such good work to make the mountain of drabble bunnies smaller and look, we already hit number thirty! Sure there are at least fifteen bunnies waiting to be written, but we have been making good work here, there are a lot less bunnies waiting now!"
"You are saying, but it is me, who has to live with being turned into all those persons."
She sighed.
"Let it out, Xander. I know you won't be happy until your little rant."
"Little rant?! LITTLE RANT!?!?"
He took a deep breath, trying to calm down.
"Well then let me get started:
First there was "For the Love of Dragons". Do you know how disconnecting it is to be turned into a sixty foot dragon? I don't think so. It felt like nothing I ever experienced and damn it, it was painful with a capital 'P'.
"The next one was "Ethan's deadly Mistake ". It was short and it looked like nothing bad happened to me there and I got to turn Ethan into sushi..."
"But?" the authoress asked.
"But you promised to write a second part some day and I so do know that I am going to suffer in it."
The authoress smiled as angelical as she could. Xander snorted.
"Don't even try it, the next costume proves my point. You know which one I mean, "Of Janus and Costumes and Xander ". You turned me into a brooding vampire..."
"Dhampire," the authoress fell him into his word.
"Ok, dhampire then. But not any dhampire, nooo sire, you had to turn me into the son of Dracula! And then you send "daddy" after me! Do you know how hard it was to explain that entire mess? No don't answer, don't even try to explain how I was forced to go to some nest in the Wallachia to meet the rest of the family.
"And then, in the next one "Sweet Dreams are Made of These", you decided that it wasn't enough to torture me, you had to drag Dawn into the mess, turning her into Death of the Endless! Ok, I must admit, being Dream was cool, but it wasn't something I want to repeat.
"To the next one. "Wizzard". I can live with being turned into Rincewind, the guy has the luck of the gods, surviving everything and always ending up in the most interesting adventures, but even in Sunnydale, it is rather hard to explain why there is a chest made out of intelligent pearwood following me everywhere and eating those that are a threat to me.
"Then there was "Quick as Silver". You just had to saddle me with Jonathan as Magneto aka my father!!
"And after that there was "Silent and Glorious". Not that nobody would notice that I'm taller, have glowing green eyes and silver colored hair that reaches down to my hips, nooo I have to share my head with the psycho. Hellooo he is so evil that he wanted to destroy all humanity, rip a hole into the plant and become a god!
"Then the next one, "Kokoro no Ryuujin". I really could have lived without the memories of Nakago's last life. But, no, was his seemingly reincarnation, I get the front seat to all the bad stuff that happened to him.
"Ok, I can understand the theory you created in "The Boy and the Ghost". Me being a demon magnet because I was an untrained shaman. But did you ever stopped to concider how many ghosts are existing on the hellmouth? And how many of them are unhappy and dangerous and, thanks to the training you gave me through Yoh, now my problem? I think not.
"Shuuichi Minamino from "Red, Green, Silver" I could live with, but you had to throw his alternate form into the mix, had you? Now every time I get highly emotional I transform and it is very difficult to hide that fact.
"The next one was a vampire, a singing one at that! Was this really nessessary? I mean the entire drabble "Looking for an original sin ", was just written to make fun of me."
"Oh, come on Xander, a vampire movie that mocks vampire movies, of course I had to write a Halloween drabble about it sooner or later. And Count von Krolock is actually one of the less mocked characters. Or would you rather have been Herbert, his gay son, or Alfred, assisstant vampire hunter and object of Herberts affection or Professor Ambronsius..."
"Alright, alright, I rest my case, but did it have to be a singing version?"
"So I went to the musical a few day earlier, sue me, or better complain to the bunnies, I'm sure they will understand."
Xander sighed. He knew he couldn't win that one.
"Well, then, to the next one. Another vampire, this one scared and so broody that he could give deadboy lessons in broddiness. I must say that "Necromancer's visit" was not something I particularly enjoyed. Ok, who am I fucking kidding here? I hated it! Asher has so many psychological problems that he makes any psychatrist run away screaming, he's drowing in his past and doesn't even know how to use a mobile phone!
"Well, what's done is done. Let's talk about the next costume you forced on me: "The final prop". I have no idea what you wanted to accieve with that costume, but I do know that it was damned dangerous to release an, ignorant to demons and the supernatural, yet armed with two almost all-powerfull gienies, young man onto the hellmouth. What if he'd made a dangerous wish? I could have turned reality upside down and wouldn't have known any better.
"But then you had to top your list of bad ideas with the next one. A train! Could it get worse than this? You turned me into a big red steamtrain in "Under the Starlight "!"
The authoress shrugged and smiled... trying to hide a plush bunny behind her back... one with roller skates tied to its paws.
"Ok, don't say anything, this drabble just answered my question, yes it can get any worse than a big red steamtrain. "Magical red Darkness "was the meanest drabble you have produced as of now! To take away Giles eyesight, his books, that was the crulest thing you ever did! True, what you did to the rest of us wasn't nice either, but Giles' change was the worst! He needs the books like I need twinkies! How could you?"
"The bunnie demanded it that way, Xander. Slayers had to be a theme costume event with everyone dressing up. An since Giles is your mentor, your fatherfigure, he had to wear a costume that showed some kind of familar relation to you. First I thought about using the costume of Xellos for you, but the only relation Xellos has, is the greater Beast and she is female. The only male character that has living male family... at least at the beginning of the series, is Zelgadis and so both of your fates were sealed. Be happy that the next theme costume bunny is fifteen drabbles away."
"Yeah, yeah... doesn't matter. What are you torturing me with this time?"
"Oh, I think you will like it... this bunny had kind of loomed in my head for some time.
"Joy."
16) Eastern Dragon modeled after Souryuu from "Yami no Mastuei" (Manga)
17) Fujiyama Ran/Aya from "Weiss Kreuz" (Anime/Manga)
18) Adrian Farenheigh Trepes/Alucard from "Castlevania" (Videogame)
19) Dream of the Endless from Neil Gaimans "Sandman" Saga (Books)
20) Rincewind from Terry Pratchetts Diskword (Books)
21) Quicksilver from "X-Men & Avengers" (Comics/Cartoons)
22) Sephiroth from "Final Fantasy VII" (Videogame)
23) Nakago/Ayuru from "Fushigi Yuugi" (Anime/Manga)
24) Asakura Yoh from "Shaman King" (Anime/Manga)
25) Shuuichi Minamino/Youko Kurama from "Yuu Yuu Hakusho" (Anime/Manga)
26) Count von Krolock from "The Dance of the Vampires" (Movie/ Musical)
27) Asher from "Anita Blake" (Books)
28) Aladdin from "Arabian Nights - Aladdin and the magic Lamp" (Book)
29) Rusty from "Starlight Express" (Musical)
30) Zelgadis Greywers from "Slayers" (Anime/Manga)